Teen Facts

Tragically, teenagers often experience violence in dating relationships.  Statistics regarding teen dating violence are staggering.

  • Approximately 1 in 5 female high school students reports being physically and/or sexually abused by a dating partner. Journal of American Medicine, 2001

  • 70% of teenage women and college women who are sexually assaulted, are raped during the course of a date. National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, 2005

  • 15% of teen girls and boys report being victims of severe dating violence (defined as being hit, kicked, thrown down or attacked with a weapon). National Center for Victims of Crime, 2004

  • Nearly 1 in 5 teenage girls who have been in a relationship report that her boyfriend threatened violence or self-harm when presented with a breakup. National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, 2005

  • 26% of teenage girls in a relationship report enduring repeated verbal abuse. National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, 2005

Dating violence may first emerge as occasional outbursts that both victims and perpetrators interpret as expressions of passion or attempts to improve their relationship.  Many victims are humiliated, criticized, and threatened by dating partners.  In some relationships, dating violence may never escalate beyond emotional and verbal abuse.  In other relationships, physical and sexual abuse become components of the violence. 

Often teen victims of dating violence keep their abuse secret.  Explanations for secretiveness include:*

  • Failure to understand they are victims

  • Embarrassment, shame, confusion

  • Threats from the abuser

  • Fear the abuser will take revenge if they say anything

  • Concern their parents will prevent the teen from seeing the abuser

  • Concern they will lose privileges - like use of a car or freedom to go out as they please

Recognizing the Warning Signs*

It is important that both teens and parents recognize the warning signs of dating violence.

Is the boyfriend/girlfriend:

  • Jealous and possessive?

  • Controlling and bossy?

  • Quick tempered, with a history of fighting?

  • Violent toward him/her or other people?

Does the dating partner:

  • Gives orders and make all decisions?

  • Checks up on the partner?

  • Refuses to allow normal contact with family and friends?

  • Try to humiliate him/her?

  • Call the teen names and insult him/her?

  • Accuse the teen of having no sense of humor?

  • Accuse the teen of being provocative?

  • Force him/her to have sex?

  • Use alcohol or drugs and pressure him/her to do the same?

Has the dating partner:

  • Attempted or threatened to commit suicide if he/she leaves the relationship or doesn’t do what he/she wants?

  • Harassed or threatened him/her or former dating partner?

  • Refused to accept the relationship isn’t working or that it is over?

* Data obtained from "If You are a Victim of Teen Dating Violence", The National Center for Victims of Crime, 2003.

Answering YES to any of these questions could mean the teen is in danger.

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